


Trust Thing

by frangipani



Series: Boundaries [5]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends - All Media Types
Genre: BDSM, F/M, Face Slapping, Femdom, Handcuffs, Non-Penetrative Sex, force yoga, luke skywalker is just an ordinary guy really, mara jade is workin' for the weekend, things to call a relationship when you don't want to call it that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-17
Updated: 2017-01-17
Packaged: 2018-09-16 18:32:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 21,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9284675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frangipani/pseuds/frangipani
Summary: He had something important to discuss.Exclusivity. Right.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've tried to rehearse the relevant points from The Care and Keeping of an Apprentice (story 4 in this series), so it's not necessary, I don't think, to read all of that monster to make sense of what's happening here. Hopefully, what Care does is hint at what might be Mara's side. But whatever. Dirty femdom porn. Let's build up to it even more, shall we?

“So I look away for just one second and somehow Jaina managed to trip Jacen as he walked away with her toy--”

“Wait, wait the twins are walking now?” 

“More like guided standing, but as I was saying then Chewie’s yelling and the twins are crying and that’s when your sister gets home.” Han’s hologram gave a that-was-a-close-one grin. “I think she came close to divorcing me right there and then.”

Luke laughed. “Oh, she couldn’t have been that mad. Sounds like you got the brunt of it as it was.”

“They’re running her ragged at the Senate.” Some of the levity left Han’s voice. “She barely has time to sit down for dinner and put the twins to bed before she has to look at briefings and talking points for the next day.” 

Luke winced sympathetically. “That’s Mon Mothma’s doing, isn’t it? She’s grooming Leia.”

Han nodded. “No end in sight.”

“I gathered from last time she was under a lot of pressure.”

“Yeah, that’s true, but…”

Luke frowned. “What is it?”

Han looked as if he were searching for the right way to phrase something. “Even if she wasn’t under the pressure she’s under, you can’t just _suggest_ sending the twins away. She wishes she could see them more as it is.” Some subtle irritation came over his expression.

“I just meant--”

“I know what you meant, kid. So did Leia.”

A bit of defensiveness welled up. “It’s just what the Old Republic Jedi had in their files...to protect young Force sensitives, it has nothing to do with--”

“Luke, none of us are doubting that the twins are vulnerable, but they’re barely over one yet.” He sighed. “You don’t understand. It’s all right.”

It felt patronizing, but Luke swallowed it down. Han was just being protective of Leia and she herself was probably so overwhelmed she’d taken the suggestion the worst way possible when he made it offhandedly just before they left the Mid Rim several weeks ago. Given what he'd been told at Yanibar, the idea of sheltering the twins somewhere distant and safe had started sounding even better, but transmissions lightyears away were not the right time or place for those kinds of heavy discussions.

“I didn’t mean to upset her,” Luke added gently. “Tell her I’m sorry.”

Han’s expression lightened. “She knows. She misses you. We all do.” The lightness faded a little. “It would help if you were back though even for a little bit.”

Luke’s frown deepened. It had been suggestion at first but the more recent transmissions had made it more overt. “You know I can’t. Not right now.” From Han’s torn expression he didn’t need the Force to sense Leia’s hand. 

“It would help her a lot to have you here.”

“I know, Han. But I can’t leave Mara’s training unfinished.”

“How’s the _apprentice_ anyway?”

Luke fought the urge to roll his eyes. He really wished Han would stop using that tone whenever he talked about Mara. “She’s fine.”

“Still nothing you’d like to tell us?” 

Luke shook his head. “No.”

He’d expected Han to laugh like he usually did, but Han only smiled and there was a tinge of hurt that made Luke’s chest tighten. It wasn’t exactly a lie, but he had no way to explain Yanibar, much less anything else between him and Mara.

“Whenever you’re ready, kid,” He seemed to perk up after. “Somehow I doubt you’re just reading old datachips and meditating though. How’s the scoundrel life treating you? Get tired of breathing recycled air yet?”

“As a matter of fact I was just down planet.” Luke brightened, maybe he could broach it somehow. “Ever heard of Yanibar?”

Han squinted. “Yanibar? Outer Rim? But there’s nothing there.”

“Except an order of Force users.”

“You’re kidding. Hidden Jedi?”

“Not Jedi. Something else.”

Han made a noncommittal sound. “Something good, right?”

He shrugged, reminded that Han would have no patience with the details. What was between him and Mara didn't even feel his enough to divulge either. “Yeah.”

And if Luke hadn’t intended to bring the conversation to a close, he sensed Mara outside of the comm room and felt her tentative greeting through the Force. He’d last seen her when she stormed into the galley to drag Ghent out from dinner to do an encryption of some messages sent to one of Karrde’s contacts, then before that they’d had training, and before that he’d had his shift. That had been the pattern more or less since they’d left Yanibar a couple of days ago.

Mara had spent most of her waking hours downing the contents of the three datacards Karrde had greeted her with once they’d docked at the _Wild Karrde_ , priming herself on the various business deals they had to negotiate once they got back on the Corellian Run, catching up with the work that had stacked up the week they’d been away. She'd mentioned needing some of the ship maintenance reports Luke had compiled so her greeting wasn't a surprise.

“I should go. We'll be at the Siskeen system in a couple of days.” Now if Mara looking for him at this hour _also_ meant she wanted some help relieving stress, he was definitely game. She hadn’t come to his cabin since before Yanibar.

“Wait.” The sudden seriousness in Han’s voice gave him pause. “About life with the scoundrels.”

Luke cocked his head. “What?”

“I’m not so respectable that I don’t hear things from time to time and rumors are that Karrde has two lightsaber-wielding operatives...” Han flashed him a disapproving look.

Luke allowed himself a laugh. “Once. I told you that too. I worked something out with Karrde, I mostly do behind-the-scenes grunt work.”

“Just be careful out there.” Han sounded genuinely worried. “Ninety percent of these fringe types are nothing, but there’s ten percent that are just as armed and just as vicious as anything the Empire could send.”

“All right, Han.”

“I mean it. You’re playing in these scumbags’ turf now, make enough of them angry and there's no telling what dirty tricks they'll come at you with. Don’t get so caught up by the whole Jedi thing that you get careless.”

“I’ll keep it in mind,” Luke said lightly. “Don’t worry so much.”

To his credit, Han looked a bit embarrassed. He shook his head. “This is what getting old is like. Take care of yourself, is all.”

“I will. Tell Leia I love her. Hugs to Chewie and the kids. We’ll probably be back in the Core in a month or so, maybe I can see them in the next transmission.” 

“We’ll work something out.”

He nodded. “May the Force be with you, Han.”

“You, too, Luke.”

The connection had scarcely closed when Luke felt another presence outside the comm room. He walked out in time to see Mara already down the corridor following Dankin, probably to look at some transmissions they'd intercepted. Through the Force, he got something resembling a wave and he sensed her attention firmly elsewhere.

With one wistful look at her departing figure already more than six feet away, he turned in the other direction towards the turbolift. At least he had the certainty that it was just that she was busy. That made waiting much easier.

Luke still marveled at how their trip to Yanibar had ended. His time there had been as painful it had been eye opening, and the end of it felt like a bruise. He could still hear the hushed voices of the Master’s Council as they told him that the dark side would come for him. 

Maybe he should have buried his feelings deeper. He hadn’t meant to have all his turmoil pour out like that, but Mara had _asked_ and he'd felt shaken, overwhelmed at the possibility of disaster, the shadow of which he'd begun to glimpse in his meditations and dismissed as old echoes. He'd come to Yanibar in search of answers to the task ahead and received none save one.

She had promised.

_Help me be strong enough...and whatever comes at us we can face between the both of us._

He wouldn’t have even imagined asking for something like that. Not now. Maybe not ever. It was his burden. It had _always_ been his burden. 

When the moment passed, he was too worn down by it all to feel nothing but gratitude. A simple thank you wasn’t enough. He'd felt that she'd been shaken too, but there she was, drawing from that inner reservoir of strength, the grip of her hand hard and stabilizing at his arm, murmuring, “You’re okay?”

He nodded and Mara went back to the cockpit while he continued his meditation. 

Luke had wished that from her since they'd started training, but as a vague dream, an ideal. After Coruscant he’d begun to imagine that coming along as other...parts of what they were to each other balanced out. It made him feel a little selfish to think that, as if her promise wasn't enough, but it _was_. It was _everything_.

Luke went through his evening routine back in his cabin, checking on Artoo at his power port, going over the ever growing list of forwarded messages from his New Republic office, perusing one of the _Chu'unthor_ datacards and taking a couple of notes, scanning the holds' task list for the next day, and his nightly meditation session. All that done, the memories were inescapable as he settled in for sleep. Now that Yanibar stung less, his longing for her had caught up to him. He couldn’t but idly recall tracing her lips with his in the warehouse, the cadence of her whispered breaths. 

He’d thought her radiant at Yanibar, especially once she’d eased in, if exasperatingly out of his reach. More than once the highlight of his day had been to see her growing confidence, and with that, her sense of contentment, different from the kind she’d radiated on the _Karrde_ \-- a more personal hue to it. He’d just wanted to bask in it and forget all the ways he was apparently unqualified to the task set before him. It stopped mattering when her eyes sought him out. He'd known she'd respected him, she wouldn't train under him otherwise, but it was at Yanibar that he'd felt clearly that it went deeper than that. She _believed_ in him.

He’d wanted to answer to that in any way he could, with all the severity of an wound. She’d been so _interested_ at times that he’d just wondered about spiriting her off to his room or cornering her somewhere out behind the storehouses. Not with any reality whatsoever, because in his fantasies her eyes would go crystalline then dark as he had his fill of her lips and her skin, no rules or reserves.

He wanted for him, but for her too, past the point of distraction at times. As necessary as Yanibar felt, he’d looked forward to their return, if anything for a more even distribution of their time, his longing growing near unbearable by the newfound openness in her Force presence. 

But here, the reality was that Mara would effectively put her whole life on hold until she got her bearings on her obligations, everything that wasn’t one-- even something as simple as dinner with the crew got pushed to the side, obviously that meant this between them, too. Luke had simply hoped because there’d been that one time before the Axxila job. At least, he’d adjusted to this shift in her, enough that he could wait gracefully. After her promise, it was the least he could do.

And yet, he couldn’t help but lie on his bunk waiting, hoping it could at least it be like that time, that even if he couldn’t touch her he could feel the press of her body, the glide of her hands on his skin, that gorgeous mouth -- even if he’d liked her best as she’d been in the docking bay, all restless energy, so close to unraveling. 

The minutes lengthened though, and he was only hard and irritated at himself for his pointless meandering thoughts, enough that he opted for shoving the arousal aside. It wasn’t any more difficult than dealing with anything else, although it did leave him feeling slightly hollowed out after, as if there were something else wrapped up in the desire that he’d shunted away too. But it was already late and tomorrow the day promised to be long, so he filed that away to deal with later and dozed off.

\--

Three days after, he and Dankin were called planetside to Siskeen, tasked with bodyguard duty to Karrde and Mara. Karrde and his business associates had settled on an upscale tapcafe as the meeting point. Thinking about what Han said, Luke opted to conceal his lightsaber in an inner flap of his tunic. 

Unlike the Axxila job where she'd been bait, Karrde had wanted Mara looking the part of management, so she was in a formal black pantsuit, complete with blazer, hair pulled up in a chignon, a datapad in her hands, and no weapons to be seen. There had been no scans or pat downs, so Luke knew her holdout was snug at her sleeve under the blazer. She had her lightsaber somewhere too, even if he wasn’t sure where. Probably near her back; she’d made an offhand comment once. It was a good look on her too, at any rate.

She and Karrde took a seat at the table in front of Keltver and his partner, a chestnut-haired woman in a conservative knee-length dress. Mara had mentioned Kelver and them sold speeders or something, and that apparently this meeting was to, in Mara's words, "persuade him of what a good thing he had before he had to be pistol-whipped across the face with it until he has no teeth left."

Mara had been under a lot of stress since their return.

“This is my sister, Sia,” Keltver introduced the woman. “She’ll be taking over the accounts.”

Luke would feel guilty at being the cause, however indirectly of all Mara's stress, but then he remembered their last night on Sha Kalan, Mara and Anse'leya facing off on the drums to the riotous shouting of the other apprentices.The look of unfettered joy remained on her face, even as she lost the rhythm, and the apprentices boo'ed. He couldn't hear her among all the noise, but she'd yelled something, still smiling. Some other apprentice had handed her another glass of those disgusting liquors, which she downed in less than a minute before joining the rest of the younglings on the blankets while others took to the drums. Mara had occasionally joined the younglings in their hooting and yelling at the performers, then in their loud singing.

Even _watching_ that had been more fun than sitting at the Master's table.

Luke scanned over to Karrde and Mara. Karrde was flashing the woman, Sia, a polite smile and stretched a hand. “I look forward to continuing our mutually beneficial partnership.”

She took it with a courteous smile of her own, but it faded quickly. “I was looking at the reports of our transactions and I wish I could give you an assurance, but we’ve recently gotten offers at a third of your prices.”

Not sensing anything to warrant scrutiny. Luke's attention turned back to the memory. Mara had ended the night passed out on the blankets with the rest of the apprentices. He'd wanted to go and wake her up to walk her back to the apprentices' quarters, but Master Skiesk had stopped him. 

"They enjoy this," he'd said. "Maybe your apprentice needs it." 

Luke had always bristled a little when the Zeison Sha Masters tried to tell him what Mara needed. For the most part they knew it to be a touchy subject too, and they'd come to an uneasy understanding where they avoided the subject. As he looked at her, apprentices nearly half her age huddled all around her as they slept in a mishmash of awkward limbs, he had to take a step back. This experience _was_ hers. She'd needed it. They'd gone to Yanibar for him, but it'd been her it'd given wings to, and so he'd nodded to Master Skiesk and went back into the temple.

Mara all but confirmed it hours later when he'd found her asleep in the corridor after a failed attempted to make it back. She'd tipsily claimed it all to be her delayed adolescence, and while he'd been more than charmed by her uncommonly candid state, he hadn't been too awestruck not to realize that this, too, had been something she'd never really had before.

Yanibar had been well worth the price. For both of them.

Without Yanibar Mara would have never promised. 

Luke's eyes flickered back to where the deal was taking place, running into Mara's as she looked up in his direction casually. He almost smiled at her before he caught himself. She turned her attention to Karrde who was speaking.

“No one with our guarantees,” Karrde said smoothly. “Your material has never gotten lost, it has always gotten to its destination at the time specified. We are worth every credit, if you don’t mind the boast.”

Sia seemed to nod reluctantly. “That is true, but given the increasing tariffs, we wonder if it might not be more beneficial to test the waters elsewhere.”

“You’re talking about Vladleron,” Mara spoke up. “He can’t offer you the same security we can. Our network is larger.”

She turned sharply to Mara, evaluative for a second. 

Mara smiled. “Knowing our competitors and their offers is part of our business.”

“Of course,” Sia replied. “So then you know their offer is one we have a hard time refusing.”

“Unless,” Keltver continued. “We are able to modify our agreement.” He grinned roguishly. “For old times’ sake.”

Karrde's voice was mildly surprised. “You would really risk your material?”

“You know what changing situations are like, Karrde. We all have to adapt, and we like to think we offer your organization a great deal with our continued business too.”

“We’d like to make another offer,” Karrde said and nodded to Mara.

Mara put her datapad on the table and turned it in Keltver's direction

“We’ll throw it in. We know you’ve been looking for this model for a while now.”

Keltver reached for it but Mara pulled it back. 

“But we won’t hear about breaking our contract. Surely, we have enough history for that to be...disagreeable,” Karrde added easily.

Sia pursed her lips. “We--”

“Fine,” Keltver interrupted. Sia frowned. “Sia go get the briefcase.” He turned back to Karrde. “Like always, I trust you’ll want your associate to go with her.”

He looked over at Mara. “No, I think you’ll want Mara here to fill you in on the latest product.”

Keltver's eyes widened slightly. “There’s more?”

Karrde smiled. “There’s always more. The question is, how much are you willing to pay for it?”

Mara fiddled with the datapad and pushed it towards Keltver again.

“Mensio,” Karrde called. “Go with Miss Keltver.” He looked over at Keltver. “I take it one of my security personnel won’t be unwelcome?”

“Of course not,” Keltver gave a dismissive handwave, too busy looking at the display.

Sia stood up, acknowledging Luke with a dip of her head. He followed.

“You look familiar,” she said once the turbolift doors had closed.

Luke thought back to what Han had said with some unease. He made himself shrug. “Get that a lot.”

“Do you?” Her lips tipped slightly. “That’s what they hire muscle for, I suppose. Forgetability.”

He stayed silent.

“You don’t look like security usually does. A little short.”

Luke had no idea how to reply to that, but at this point, he knew that was probably a cue to keep quiet.

“But that just means you have other talents, no?” The turbolift opened and she walked on ahead, heels clicking on the permacrete floor of the lower hangar.

She went towards an expensive looking landspeeder, a sleek model he’d never seen. She must have caught him looking at it because she let out a laugh.

“Boys and their toys.” She pulled out an alloy briefcase, met his eyes and tipped her head towards the vehicle. “Overlanders are our business after all.” She offered him the briefcase. He took it and followed her back to the turbolift.

They rode in what seemed to Luke increasingly uncomfortable silence. He felt Sia’s curiosity, and the kind of curl to it that signaled attraction, and he hoped she would keep it in check. He had no idea how to play it other than how he mostly did, inching slowly, ever so slowly away.

Not that Sia wasn’t attractive, but there was no _there_ there, even if he didn’t think of Mara, which brought to mind that they'd never discussed exclusivity, so _she_ could, and the thought suddenly bothered him so much he barely registered that Sia had hit the emergency stop button. He almost lost his balance and slammed into the wall when the turbolift jerked to a stop.

Luke was still holding on to the briefcase when Sia came up to him and pressed her lips against his, hard.

She brought a hand under his chin and her hazel eyes searched his for a second, suspicion coiling within them, and he didn’t think, he just dropped the briefcase and backed her against the wall, kissing her presumptuously, like the deal, his cover and continued stay on the _Karrde_ , _everything_ depended on it because it might.

He broke away quickly, brought a hand to her arm in a tight grip and said, “I need this job.”

She smiled. “Do you, now. And I suppose that means no distractions?” She tsk'ed. “I appreciate that professionalism.” She ducked a hand under his shirt. If she shifted her hand to the side, she’d find the lightsaber and he moved back. The smile went smug like everything was a foregone conclusion, but she didn't touch him again. Instead, she reached to her purse, pulling out a flimsi-card. It had a symbol on it, but was otherwise blank. Sia slid it into the pocket of his pants.

“If you have off hours. I’m at the Mirage. Show this at the front desk and they’ll tell you where to go.”

She turned and hit the button again. The turbolift continued its ascent, the doors opened and he walked back into the tapcafe with the briefcase, following Sia.

He put it down next to the table, taking his usual position adjacent to Karrde and Mara's table. He was sure he wasn’t broadcasting, but Mara must have picked up on something, because he felt the weight of her gaze in kilotons.

Was this an opening to broach exclusivity? He didn’t think there was an issue. For one Mara was too busy, and for another, she could have him for anything she wanted -- he thought he made that clear. He was beginning to think, too, that the types of inclinations Mara had would make it hard for a simple cantina fling to satisfy. He hoped. So there was that.

Luke still wondered.

The deal was done shortly after that. All four of them made their way back to the apartments that Mara had arranged for them while they were planetside.

\--

“She had the hots for you, huh?”

Luke looked up from his datapad where he was opening the files Winter had sent him containing the latest holos of the twins. He reached for his mug of hot chocolate. “What?”

It was one day after the meeting. Karrde and Mara were overseeing the loading of the merchandise over at the docking bay. He and Dankin were to make their own way back to the _Karrde_ since Luke had shift in the afternoon.

“The feeds at the tapcafe holocams.” Dankin grinned over his mug of caf. “Karrde had Ghent reroute all the feeds to his datapad. Kretvel is a slippery snake. He’s switched merch on us before, so we like having as many eyes on them as possible. Looked intense there for a second.” He flashed Luke a look dripping with innuendo. “I didn't know you needed this job _that_ much.”

He felt heat rise up to his ears. "No," he gasped, horrified. "That was _recorded_?"

Dankin laughed uproariously. “It’s not a big deal, Skywalker!” he consoled, reaching to clap him on the shoulder. “Sometimes these business types are high strung. I’ve had a couple want to have their evil ways with me too. You could have gone see her if you wanted. Karrde’s not that strict about jobs." He snickered. "Maybe you could have gotten us a better deal too.”

Luke covered his face.

“Is that like a Jedi thing? Are you supposed to meditate it all away or something?”

Luke shook his head and made himself take a sip of his drink to wash down the embarrassment. The hot chocolate was a surprising finding in the apartment's kitchen. As far as he knew the space had been vacant before they moved in and no one in the crew but him liked it -- Mara, in fact, would often go out of her way to turn her nose up at it even though he suspected she liked it more than she let on. It wasn’t a topic that had come up recently though. 

“No…” He didn’t even try to finish the thought.

“We dodged a bolt there.” Dankin served himself another cup. “She almost recognized you. Mara said the next time we’re on security we’d need to consider a disguise for you. Not carrying the light stick doesn’t seem to be enough, even skulking around the Outer Rim like we are.”

The embarrassment switched to cold fear. “Wait, wait -- Mara saw it?”

“Yeah,” Dankin said, as if it were obvious. “The surveillance was her idea.”

Luke wanted to play this as casually as possible and promptly tucked that sinking feeling away. “Did she say anything else?”

“Not really, why?”

“Every time I make a mistake she bites my head off,” he made himself mutter. 

Dankin laughed. “I thought you were training her.”

“I am.”

“So return the favor.” 

He frowned at him. “It’s different.”

Dankin shrugged. “Anyway, you’re fine. I wouldn't call it a mistake. Mara just looked surprised.”

Luke nodded without any unease abating. The day before they’d all returned to the apartments, ordered food with Mara and Karrde going back and forth on the contracts. She’d broken off to meditate with him while Karrde and Dankin went over the latest transmissions. This was just before he’d settled in for the night, and she went back to her room probably to stay up to obscene hours on her comlink arranging pick ups and drop offs, as well as reading up on the next deal, so regardless, Mara knew he hadn’t gone to see Sia. But thinking back, it could have looked like he’d wanted to. Dankin thought so. 

He needed to talk to her.

“When are she and Karrde going to be back, you think?”

“Not sure. Midday? Depends on how smooth the loading goes and who they have to grease up at customs.”

She had said that she’d comm about training when she got back to the ship. That would mean shelving the whole thing until then.

Luke fought the impulse to grind his teeth.

\--

Mara commed late in the afternoon. He had shift, and got held up over some new ships he and Corvis were compiling a list of necessary repairs for. She was already waiting for him in the _Wild Karrde’s_ exercise room by the time he'd showed up after sonic'ing off the engine lubricants and grime off him. She'd been stretching, sitting with her legs folded, heels against each other, spine lengthened forward in a taut line. Luke watched as she reached further with her arms straightened, fingers spread until her forehead was a couple of inches above the mats, her braid pooled off to her side, a bright swath of color against the dark of the mats. She'd already taken out the three remotes they had taken to training with after Yanibar.

Luke waited until she came back up to ask, “Loading went well?”

She went for another stretch, straightening her legs in front of her and rotating her shoulders as she extended in a forward bend until her forehead was past her knees. She answered a few minutes later when she came back up, drawing herself up to stand, and walked towards him, “Blasted slugworms get more expensive every year. Used to be dirt cheap to get cargo through customs here.”

“Bribery’s not what it used to be?” He passed his fingers along her temple to initiate the training bond.

“Galactic stability has its downsides.” As Mara brought up her end, there was a spike of what he recognized as her general tension level, more immediate with the training bond. The first thing Luke felt was relief. Although she could easily cover up anger with the training bond, he’d be able to sense something was amiss -- and all he was getting was a loud buzz of stress, but that'd been near constant since Karrde had given her the datacards. 

“Sorry." There was a faint undercurrent of self consciousness underneath. “Give me a second.” 

She inhaled and he felt the buzz lessen as if muting a staticky speaker. Given the level of it, he thought with some sympathy, it probably wouldn’t dissipate unless she settled in for deep meditation. What was odd was how self conscious she was about it -- she was shielding it well enough that it was barely perceptible normally, even though since Yanibar she'd been more nuanced with her shielding, especially while on the _Karrde_ , saving her tightest shields for when they were downplanet. 

Luke pushed those matters aside and shifted his attention fully to the exercises he’d planned out.

The first were some quick lightsaber sequences, all routine at this point, just to keep her sharp. He'd moved her onto the combination exercise and meditation postures next since they'd come back, similar but more challenging than her stretches. While part of the reason he’d been choosing them was to help her reroute, if not manage the stress, he also meant to use them to check on her concentration level. Her time with the Zeison Sha had increased her focus, although her tension these days made it difficult to evaluate by how much. By next week when things settled, he figured he'd have a clearer sense of her current skill level and could adjust the rest of the lessons accordingly.

Luke glanced at three depowered remotes at one corner of the room. By now all he had to do was gesture to them. Mara nodded, breathing in, and he felt her open herself to the Force. A pull and the three remotes rose maybe six or seven feet from the ground.

“Start from the first meditation sequence.”

Mara dropped to her hands and knees on the mat, raising herself on her arms, her wrists aligned under her shoulders. She slowly straightened her knees. She held it for a few minutes, her body forming a perfect inverted 'v'. 

Already, the low buzzing decreased further, he noted, pleased. Through the Force he signaled that she should move along to the next position.

Mara inhaled while she lifted her left leg slowly until it was near vertical from the floor. On the exhale she shifted forward, folding the leg, bringing her shoulders over her wrists, her bent left knee ending on the mats between her hands, right leg straight behind her. She stayed in that position for a few breaths and reached for her back leg.

Luke sent her the equivalent of a _hold_. She had a tendency to move too quickly into these, probably falling into the habit of unconsciously taking them as stretches. Here, it was just about process as it was about ends. 

"Breathe for a while."

Luke felt her instinctive pushback, that wasp's nest of stress, all that _so much I should be doing, I have to be doing, because if I don't_ \--

When they'd first begun training that sort of thing would jar her right out, and they'd needed to start over. A bit further down the line, the intrusion of her obligations wouldn't have the impact to jolt her out, but it'd interfere with her focus, and he'd had to bring it to her attention. It was different now as he witnessed her bringing her concentration to bear, sinking further into the Force. 

Luke had a sense of expectation, as if she were waiting for him to say when. Eventually she wouldn't need that either. He waited, feeling as her inner tension lessened bit by bit, until it was like filmy cobweb. This was as low as it would go for the session.

She could move along to the next position.

Mara slowly bent her back leg behind her, pointing the foot up. She turned her upper body slightly and wrapped her right hand around her foot. With an exhale she lifted her left arm. Luke intuited she was about to continue. Not yet.

"Hold," he said for emphasis.

She held the position with more ease, and he let the seconds lengthen into minutes. They hadn't entered into the challenging part yet.

She could continue.

Mara lowered her arm, and moved her raised foot to the hollow of her right elbow. She lowered her left arm behind her head to link the fingers of both hands. She turned slightly, squaring her shoulders, angling her head down, lengthening her torso. He read a prick of normal discomfort from her sense as her body got used to the new angles, the remotes sliding down minutely.

"Left shoulder," he called. "Square, but keep it relaxed."

Mara breathed and loosened it. Luke noted the remotes hadn't risen. Her concentration had taken a hit.

He waited. This was where the challenging part began. At the end of the day, training boiled down to learning to listen, to another, to oneself, to the Force. Sometimes that entailed letting go of what was most comfortable. There were days when Yoda would keep him tangled up like a choc twist from dawn to dusk, leaving him barely able to walk the next day, and still out of his skin with worry over needing to be out _there_ doing something that felt more tangible, something _real_ , something he knew he could do well. Bringing it up more often than not had earned him a solid thwack with Yoda's gimmer stick and a series of even more complicated and excruciating exercises, enough not to dwell on such things and focus on the now.

But then again, Luke suspected Yoda had always known his time with him had been limited and that training necessarily had to be compressed and intensive. Luke saw no need to adopt that blunt force approach with Mara; there were a lot of subtleties he'd missed in the rush to advance his skills. 

She was also a more disciplined student.

The remotes still hadn't risen though. Her concentration was shaken. He kept that observation away from the bond, wanting to see if she could detect it and work through it. 

She could move to the next position.

Mara let her foot go, turned it out slightly, brought her hand out under her foot and spun out her elbow until her elbow was straight above her head, hand clasping the foot behind her. The bend of the elbow along with the bend of her knee behind it formed a vague triangular shape, if not for the tight arch of her back. 

Again, he urged her to keep the pose. He had her stay there for longer and sometime during, he felt her Force pull the remotes back up and smiled. "Okay, close it up." 

This was the final bit of the sequence, Mara brought her free hand to her elbow, bending it in the process, then slid her hand along the stretched underside of her bent arm, so it too wrapped around her foot. She now had both arms bent behind her head, hands around her back bent foot. She was about to slowly bring her head back and arch further, but through the Force he called her attention with a kind of _wait_. 

Something was off, and he went towards her with a tilt of his head, circling her on the mats. 

"Something's off," Mara muttered. She'd closed her eyes earlier on in the sequence. 

Luke crouched behind her. "Here." He pressed his hands firmly high against her upper arms, that done he pulled her arms back smoothly up towards the elbows. Her sense twinged with sharper discomfort, but within bounds. He brought a hand to her straightened shoulder. "Soft here."

"Yeah, I think..." Mara's voice sounded slightly strained as she fell deeper into the position. "Okay. I got it." Her voice was back to even, sense balancing out and she slowly brought her head back. Her clasped foot was now cleanly behind her head, her braid dripping down to the mats, her left leg bent in front of her. Luke stood and moved back to the end of the room.

Mara breathed, and sank further into the life Force flowing around them, between them, becoming the constituent cells within her, as much as those of his, of everyone on the ship. It felt paradoxically as much as a gradual emptying out as a filling in. She couldn't hold this for long, not yet, but the fact that she had achieved this always made him immeasurably proud considering how difficult things had initially been. Someday, more than dispersing herself in the Force's life giving current, she'd be able to listen to it. Someday she'd be able to give it _voice_.

She still had a ways to go before that. Through the training bond he saw her concentration waver after some time. A short bit after, her skin acquired a fine sheen of sweat. A slight shake came to the bent arms and the leg. The remotes slid down a bit. Before long her leg started shaking.

 _Steady_ , Luke sent from where he stood, his arms behind his back. Her reliance on the Force needed a bit of work. She tended to pull back even before she'd reached her body's limits as if anticipating that the Force wouldn't be enough to sustain her. That quick shuttling created a counterproductive effect similar to whiplash, which splintered her connection to the Force in such a way it ricocheted back to the physical, wearing her out even more. 

“You’re not doing this through your own strength," he reminded her. "You can stay in the flow. If you need to, just pull on the Force _before_ you feel tired. Don’t let it get to the point where it affects your concentration. You risk diminishing returns.”

Mara inhaled and exhaled slowly. Luke felt her physical tension ease a bit as she pushed herself back under, her balance returning. Her hand and her leg stopped shaking, the remotes went back to their original position.

He had her stay like that for some time.

As of late he'd become aware of how misguided his first efforts at training her had been back at Wayland. His own blind spots had made him too focused on blunt skills over the deeper awareness that granted the knowledge of when and how to use them. He'd begun training her in the style he himself had been trained under without considering that she hadn't started from the same point. It had turned out okay, but perhaps if he'd been just a little bit more perceptive, a little bit wiser, he would have helped her solidify her connection to the Force for itself since then, instead of giving her yet another tool -- she might have found some measure of peace sooner. The Zeison Sha were right about more than they were wrong. About him, at least. But there was nothing to be done but be better.

"Left side."

Mara opened her eyes and pulled her head up, letting go of the back bent foot and straightening the leg. She slid her arms, then her whole torso forward to lie on the mats, her bent right leg under her. After a few breaths, she came up on her hands, pushing back with her extended leg and pulled her bent leg until she was back in the original position. She repeated the same movements as before with the opposite side of her body-- less rushed this time, so Luke only had to ask her to hold only a couple of times.

Once she came back to the original position, back to forming that inverted 'v' with the floor, he indicated she should continue onto the next sequence. After a few breaths, Mara got on her hands and knees, placing her forearms on the ground where she'd had her hands. She straightened her knees, lifted her hips to get into the same basic position. Slowly she moved her feet up and lifted first one leg towards the ceiling. She breathed for a few moments, then she lifted the other, shifting into an elbow handstand. Through the bond, Luke found her focus solid, and he noted happily, she was drawing on the Force for balance. 

Now on an elbow handstand, Mara slowly began arching her back. Given her concentration level now, she could probably use more of a challenge. She was still slowly bending her knees back when he flicked on the remote with the Force and had it fire.

Mara went into a fluid roll, standing in an instant, but her lightsaber was no longer on her, and in the second that she whirled to look for it, the remote sent a couple of blasts that caught her in the hip, and the other two remotes fell. The attacking remote was on the highest power setting, and that coupled with her half spin in search of her weapon made her lose her balance.

She came back up, panting, still scanning for her lightsaber. 

Luke raised it up and opened his palm to offer it as he lowered the remote he'd used to the mats. He’d whisked the lightsaber away from her while she was getting into one of the positions. 

She laughed as she called it to her hand and clipped it back to her belt. “Sneaky.”

“The concentration is great. It would be even better if it was in line with awareness. Falling into the flow of it is one level, but ideally you would come out the other side,” he said, approaching her and lightly trailing his fingers along the side of her head, they came back wet with her sweat, but he was used to locking his focus firmly to training. The bond fell away. “I think that’s enough for today.” 

Mara took on a pensive expression. "Right, passive, but aware. There's also the shuttling issue."

Luke nodded. "We'll keep at it. The concentration is still as good as it's ever been." The buzzing had been barely even perceptible by the end, even through the bond. 

"I suppose after a week of discblade drills..." she said, reaching for a towel to wipe her face.

"We could go back to it next week, if you like," he offered. "The disc provides more practice with precision than the remotes. Fine control, like you mentioned."

She went for a water bottle next. "Sure. I want to keep working on the meditation though," she gestured around them, "See if I can finally come out the other side." 

"No reason why we can't do both. I'll go over a few of the datacards. There's bound to be some exercise that can be tweaked."

Mara nodded and took a swig of the bottle. Luke stared at her back as she went to put the towel in the used towel bin. Now that training was done and she'd be on her way the same anxiety from the morning suddenly flared up. Ignoring attraction was one thing. That was easy. It was the rest of it that was more difficult to section off. He needed to broach the subject of other people. He didn’t want her thinking that he’d wanted anything with Sia. Or anyone else for that matter. She might not care, he thought with a stab of disappointment, but _he_ did. 

“You’re going to dinner?” He kept his tone casual. “The crew has a betting pool for how long you'll be living on ration bars.”

She snorted. “Shortest?”

“A day." Luke flashed her an amused look. "Ghent.”

She shook her head.

“But he might not have understood what he was betting on -- Dankin did tell him while he was on his datapad.”

“He’s always on his datapad. Dankin probably did it on purpose. I think he still ropes him into sabbacc games too. He never learns. Karrde should just save payroll the trouble and deposit Ghent's pay to Dankin's account.”

"Wouldn't last that long. Chances are he'd hack his pay back to his account once he realizes he has no credits to buy those underworld holothrillers he likes so much."

She smiled at that. “What did you say?”

“Me? I’m not participating.”

“Oh?” Her smile broadened. “The resident Jedi too good to lose credits on crew betting pools?”

Luke chuckled. “I wasn’t _allowed_ to participate. The crew apparently didn’t think me above influencing you to my advantage--”

“That right there,” she interrupted wryly, pointing a finger in his direction, “is how reputations get ruined, Skywalker. Hang around with smugglers long enough...” She took a long drink from her water.

For a split second he debated on some sort of suggestive remark, but lost his nerve. One thing was Yanibar where there was no hope at all, and another thing was pushing his luck here, when at any moment, things might fall into place. “I would probably bet after this set of deals. You can probably last indefinitely on ration bars though.”

She made a face. “Sometimes I think I'll have to. I still have inventory and contracts to go over.”

He nodded and watched as she finished her water, discarding the bottle. That was as far as he could go here, if they were anywhere else…

Mara pulled out her datapad, checking her messages while Luke put the remotes away trying to figure out some way to bring Sia up. He understood that he’d left it all up to her when she wanted, what she wanted, but there simply was no space for him anywhere and he was choking in all the things he wanted to say. He didn’t even want to ask her for anything, just explain.

Mara straightened up and slid her datapad into her satchel. He followed her out the exercise room and into the turbolift feeling his insides knot up, because it would be just like her to just sweep everything under the rug, or worse to sweep it away as it never happened. Or maybe, he thought with increasing dread, sweep _them_ away like they’d never happened. He didn’t think she would. He hoped she wouldn’t.

He just didn’t know. 

Luke snuck a glance at her. She was oddly blank, both in expression and in the Force, probably back to shielding that stress. At least it was less now. 

On impulse as soon as the doors closed he hit the emergency stop button and turned to her. 

“Dankin sai--”

The statement got wrenched into a grunt when she dropped the bag and shoved him back hard enough that his head hit the wall with a solid thunk, the rail of the turbolift digging hard into his back. And he was just getting his bearings when he realized she was undoing the fastenings of his pants. It was with choked disbelief that he watched her crouch down and push them down, reaching for his cock through his underwear, green eyes on his with that intensity that hadn’t yet failed to pull him under. 

When he dropped a hand to her shoulder he really meant it as _wait_ , but her eyes flicked to it a second before she pulled it over her breast. That definitely sent a jolt through his system, arousal slamming into him like a power hammer, a sharp gasp squeezed out of his lungs.

Mara kept her eyes on him as her hand closed around his cock. She batted the hand on her breast off, and shifted to lick up from base to head, before taking him into her mouth, and _there_ rational thought just went right out the airlock. 

Maybe it was because since Axxila there’d been nothing, or maybe she knew now how to have him gasping in a mortifyingly short time, or maybe it was how she did it -- not an inch of pause or hesitation, like she wanted this and was perfectly entitled to have it. Have _him_ , the thought blazed through his head like mercury, and he was gripping the turbolift rail, knuckles pailing, as Mara worked him in quick strokes. She was sliding a hand into his underwear to cup him as she sucked the head of his cock in tandem to the drag of her other hand, pressing hard with her tongue as she moved drawing out one cracked gasp after another. 

All that was left of him was trying not to thrust into her mouth, hot and wet, the stuff of fantasies, but she shifted her hands to clutch his ass, fingers digging in hard enough to bruise, took him deeper, her head bobbing along his length, and he was suddenly not sure how breathing worked anymore. He wasn't sure how _anything_ worked anymore. 

A small sound fell from him at the unbelievable feeling of her mouth on him, and too late, his hips did jerk. She pulled back, but her hand was back on him with increasing speed, as she licked and mouthed at the length of him, messy and uninhibited. He’d barely caught on to the fact that _oh, she’s really doing this here_ , before she took him into her mouth again, leaving him to stare on slack jawed.

He had a fever-dream awareness of Mara returning his gaze, eyes sliding over him in a way he could feel on his skin. Between that and the way she looked with those red lips wrapped around his cock, it was too much. He murmured an expletive, closing his eyes, lost in the heat and pressure of her mouth, the brush of her tongue. A desperate need to touch her welled up, the prohibition sharp on its heels, even as his release jackhammered through him, too late to even garble out a warning. She swallowed right through it, tongue still stroking as it receded until he hissed at the overstimulation, shifting away slightly, his head buzzing.

Mara released him and Luke leaned back heavily against the railing, panting, staring as she wiped her mouth, now even more tantalizingly crimson, and got his clothes back on him with the same ruthless efficiency she used to get them off. All of it felt undeniably possessive and he didn’t dare release the strained grip he had on the rail for fear of his impulse to seize her and bite more red into her lips, taste himself on her tongue.

By sheer self discipline, he stamped out the near frantic urge. She had _rules_ , he reminded himself, willing the shakiness of his legs away. He was not going to screw this up.

And he had something important to discuss. 

Exclusivity. Right.

Luke took a breath, ready to begin, and promptly stopped when she grabbed his hand and tucked it under the waistband of her pants, brought it right between her legs under her underwear. Her eyes had gone dark enough to fall in, and she let out a breath as his hand reached between her thighs. The thin cloth of her underwear was drenched, and he couldn’t decide what made his blood pound more -- that she was this wet or that she was actually giving him a chance to do something about it.

The thought might have made him a little too enthusiastic. Before he knew it he was turning and pushing her back against the turbolift doors with his free hand, pressing the heel of his other against her. Her hips jutted forward as Mara gasped, and that only made him want his mouth on her, _any_ part of her, but if this was what she was offering, then _of course_ he was taking.

Except that Mara suddenly smiled and reached up to cup his cheek. For just a second really, because in the next she hit the release for the emergency stop, and he realized she hadn’t been offering _at all_.

He looked at her in disappointment and removed his hand.

This wasn’t his level but he followed after her. “You’re busy tonight? When will you be done with inventory checks?”

“Late,” Mara replied, and it was surprisingly not coy or teasing, regretful rather, a sigh hidden in there. “Very late.”

He didn’t want to talk here, but he didn't sense anyone around and Mara wasn't giving him any other opportunities. “We need to talk about Sia.”

She shook her head and there was nothing edged to that either. “There’s nothing to talk about." She waved a hand. "It was a good idea to go for distraction. Could have found you out and _that_ would have been a mess. We _should_ talk about disgui--"

“Not about her,” he interrupted. “We need to talk about other people.”

Mara tilted her head, expression carefully blank, sense in the Force suddenly even more so. “Oh?”

“I don’t want to do this,” he gestured to both of them, “with anyone else.”

To his surprise, Mara nodded, the guardedness fading away to understanding. Her Force sense was back to even. “I know,” she said matter of factly.

Her response left him utterly confused. “That…” He gestured vaguely behind him. “What was that?” 

Luke thought he glimpsed a shadow of _that_ look, that intense stare, but just a shadow and for an instant, her expression went back to normal, maybe even lighter than that.

She chuckled a bit, a fond smile on her face that would normally send warmth through him, but the the weight of all he wanted to say between them felt too crushing. However lovely it was on her, right now, that easy smile was entirely at odds with how he felt.

“It’s just that it’s been a while, hasn’t it?” He had no clue how to read that, whether she was saying it about him or her -- he didn’t even think he believed that as an explanation, not fully. They weren't _really_ in a private context, so he did reach out a little more. He should be able to sense if she were upset, but she was definitely...not and for now she wasn't shielding either. 

Luke felt slight disappointment...and eagerness from her, but she was still talking. “I’ll see about carving some time. After Herdessa my schedule -- ,” none of what he was getting contradicted what she was saying, even if he reached a little further, just a little..., “Stop trying to pull it out of my head and _talk_ , Luke. I want to get those checks over with and get more than four hours of sleep. What is it?”

He cringed at being caught, but she was just impatient, not angry. “I’m sorry. About Sia--”

She cocked her head. “If you were worried I’d be upset...I’m not. Really.” She patted him on the arm. Luke decided he hated that pat just as much as he loved her hand on his cheek. “I get it." She gestured between them. "It’s a trust thing.” 

He did believe that Mara wasn't upset, even if he didn’t think it was quite as clear-cut as she was making it out to be. Everything about her felt normal -- but back at the turbolift that hadn’t felt like scratching an itch _at all_. It felt like that first time when she kissed him, like she’d been staking a claim. His heart sank. He hadn’t imagined it. Maybe she didn’t even see it that way, which this being Mara could be the case, and if so, that was...frustrating. 

“My schedule should clear up soon,” she reassured. “I’m nearly done prepping for the last deal we have in this system. We talk to suppliers either today or tomorrow and I won't be playing catch up anymore.”

Luke nodded at her, but it struck him with clarity that it was frustrating because while he set out to assure her without wanting her to respond in kind, he _did_. Even if she were too busy to take strangers to her bed. Even if they couldn’t give her what he could.

And that he couldn’t ask for it.

He knew what he’d agreed to, and this was what treading lightly _meant_.

A weight settled in his chest.

“Okay.”

Mara was still staring at him, her calmness fading bit by bit. As it did, he felt the drumming of her stress steadily ratchet back up. The fact that he could feel it this sharply without the bond made him realize that no matter what, this was not the time. He plastered a casual smile on his face just as she asked, “What is it?”

“Nothing,” he said over the disquiet sinking its claws into him. “Just wanted to make things clear. Let me know when you’re free.”

Luke turned and walked back to the turbolift.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _This between them was a trust exercise. If Luke was going to place himself at her hands, then the least she could do was to be an unmovable object, the wall he could dash himself against._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Any and all resemblances to RL bdsm are incidental. This series is highly underconsented, excuse me undernegotiated.

It was a white flimsi-card Luke found in his room at the new apartments downplanet when he came back from shift a few days later. 

By then they had reached the outer edge of the Mid Rim. Karrde's dealings had taken them to Herdessa, a planet with close ties to the New Republic, which would give Mara a chance to meet with several New Republic officials on Smuggler's Alliance business. 

The flimsi-card had no logo, just an address complete with room number scribbled with a writing instrument. He knew it was from Mara, he could sense her on it, the faint imprint of her presence like perfume as he slid his thumb over the smooth surface.

He didn’t like it.

Ever since the aborted conversation a couple of days ago, he’d kept on to their same routines, but he’d tried to work out where that hollow feeling came from. It felt too much like regret, but it wasn’t. He would do everything all over again. 

Mara promised and that mattered. The rest would fall into place.

Luke held that hope to himself as he followed the address. It led him to an ordinary business hotel. In the reception, he gave the receptionist the room number and was handed a keycard.

The darkened room took him by surprise. Mara hadn’t arrived, and he consulted the chrono on the table. Luke looked at the card again. It was the hour she set and he knew from the detailed schedules he'd had Ghent hack from her datapad that she'd just gotten out of her last meeting maybe an hour ago. If she was planning to go back to the apartments for anything before heading here, she'd be cutting it close. No wonder she was late. Even through the unease, it was hard not to be flattered she was that eager. 

Luke turned on the lights. The room was nothing out of the ordinary, a simple bed, a desk, and a small 'fresher unit. There was a large window on the far end that overlooked a busy thoroughfare. For a while, he just stared out at the skylanes under the rainy night from the room's large window. The planet wasn't as urbanized as Coruscant, but in the night the lights melded into one another and the effect was familiar enough to send a faint pang through him. He pushed that off to the side. He wouldn't become morose. He was where he needed to be.

The door clicked behind him. Even without the Force he knew it was Mara because that was all he heard. Those kinds of silences tended to give her away.

“I didn’t know what to expect,” Luke said without turning. “Not this.”

Mara made a noncommittal sound and he heard her drop her bag. “Thin walls at the apartments. Not soundproof like the _Karrde_.” 

“Ah.” He hadn't really thought about it like that, but it did make sense. He turned to face her. “How long did you get the room for?”

Mara was in her work get up, casual tunic shirt and pants, hair in her usual braid down her back. That was a relief, somehow, right now. He’d dread to find her dressed to the nines with cosmetics on her face. He felt a bizarre kind of gratitude that confused him. He’d puzzle that out later. 

She dragged her eyes up on him. “Long enough. Take off your clothes.”

Luke waited while she went and sat down on the bed, maybe a foot or two from the headboard. “Do you need more instructions?” She tilted her head. “Face me and take off your shirt.”

Like last time, he found himself blushing at the heaviness of her gaze on him even as he brought his hands to the hem of his shirt.

“Look up.”

He hadn’t even realized he wasn’t. 

“Keep your eyes on me. Now take off the pants.” 

He felt weirdly nervous. How long had it been? Two weeks?

She made an impatient grunt. “Look up. You’ve taken your pants off enough times that I’m sure you can do it without looking. Don’t make me repeat myself.”

Luke snapped his head up. The nervousness didn’t stop the way anticipation sharpened in him. 

“The underwear.”

The awkwardness lingered under her scrutiny still, but she smiled slow, and there, the awkwardness slid off to intrigue. Through the muddle of everything it was clear enough that she wanted him or this, and that always ended up with him falling to pieces. He wondered if he could shift that in some way, and he was vaguely hard, but just the thought of being able to move this, move _her_ in any way made his pulse hammer harder.

“Sit.” She patted the spot beside her nearer to the head of the bed.

Luke made his way to her, pulse speeding up even more, because he was still not sure what to expect from her when they were together like this -- her hands and mouth on him maybe, but the path kept varying. By now he knew for a fact she wanted him, but that was increasingly looking like the answer to a question he hadn’t yet figured out.

Mara pulled up her bag with her. From that bag, she pulled out rope and undid the knot that tied the thick coils together. That was somewhat familiar. But when his gaze slid up to Mara, it felt startlingly different. Maybe it was the expectation.

His eyes were drawn to the way her hands moved over the rope, the careful way she undid the knot tying the thick coils. A strand of red-gold hair fell over her face as she looked down intently, tension in her posture as if she were focusing on some ritual, and irrationally, he didn’t want to share her, not with any ritual, or rope, not anything or anyone else, not tonight. He'd waited too long.

“That’s a lot of rope.”

Mara looked up sharply, like he broke a spell. “No small talk.”

What would she do if he pushed for once?

“Like last time?” Luke scooted closer to her.

Mara's head came up again, reflexive outrage coiling in the set of her shoulders and he could pinpoint the moment where she dialed it back, as if thinking he hadn't meant to intervene.

Luke leaned forward a bit too close to make it beyond a doubt. “Will you take off your clothes--”

“You need to shut up,” she cut him off.

He laughed, and the expression of affronted surprise on her face was priceless. It melted away soon enough and she pushed the rope back into the bag. For a frightening second, he thought he'd made a terrible mistake. He hadn't played this right at all. She was just going to go -- but before the feeling could morph into regret, he saw she wasn’t going anywhere, just pushing the rope back in and pulling out two pairs of stun cuffs instead.

Mara smiled, smug at the surprise on _his_ face, maybe misreading it to be about the cuffs. “Have it your way then.” 

She took his right wrist and clicked the cuff on it, then she swung a leg over, her knees at either side of him, and pushed his arm back, closing the cuff around the bedpost.The fingers of his free hand flexed a little. Looming over him like this, she was _so close_ , the urge to touch her gathered tight under his skin.

He was going to try for another reaction then. “So we’re not going for aesthe--” 

Pain broke across his awareness, impact clattering down his jaw, followed by a sharp sting. His head ended turned, his cheek burned, and when he looked up, her hand was frozen across from her at an angle. Mara had moved back slightly, sitting up on her heels now, and her eyes were on him with a kind of distant curiosity that didn’t fool him for a second. This between them passed like an electric current, settling low in him, just as it rose up her face in a lovely flush.

He brought his hand up, intending to bring it to his cheek, but seized by an impulse he couldn't explain he only lifted it between them.

Mara looked as if he'd dared her -- to what, he wasn't sure. She slid forward, bracing herself with an arm on the bed beside his waist as if she were going to crawl up his body. She took his outstretched hand, eyes latching onto his as she licked his palm with the flat of her tongue, once, twice; wrapped her lips around his thumb and _sucked_ , did it with all of his fingers, and licked his palm again, slow, wet, and obscene, until his hand was dripping. It should be absurd, but it left him thinking of her amazing mouth on his cock, and that hot stare she gave him was like that, so it was only filthy in a way that got him from aroused to skirting painfully hard even before she was done. 

Once she was done she shifted back on her heels and released his hand, fixing him with an appraising stare. “Touch yourself.”

It wasn't necessarily that he didn’t want to even though that was way down the list of things he’d want to do here, with her. It was different from before in ways he couldn’t pin down. He just wasn't feeling like making it easy for her. There was this _thing_ now.

Luke smiled, putting as much insolence in it as could as he brought the hand beside him down to the sheets, looking up at her as he wiped it down carelessly. “No.”

She slapped him again.

Part of him expected it, so it didn’t feel quite as sharp as last time, even as it wrested a grunt from him, the burn quickly fading to a throb. He was left staring down at her pant covered knee at his side, breathing shallowly. Her hand was back at his cheek, cool against it, the contrast even more enlivening. All of it bright. 

His eyes slid back up to her face, red staining her cheeks, the white of her teeth as they bit down her lip, and watching her find this in them was somehow even _better_.

Her expression went soft. Her hand shifted down a little from the heat of his stinging cheek, her thumb rubbing across his lower lip. “You’re not going to give me anything tonight?” she murmured. “Are you?”

He flicked his tongue over the pad of her thumb. Her breath caught and it was tempting to fall back into the usual pattern, to soak in the intensity of how much she wanted him. Knowing he could might make him a little more daring, a little less careful. 

Luke smirked at her. “Guess you’ll just have to take it.”

The slap cracked across his face and he was prepared for it this time. The sting concentrated where her palm met the center of his cheek and spread, speeding up his heartrate, sending anticipation rattling through him. He darted his eyes back to her face. It must be like that for her, if in a different direction. He’d only need to close his eyes to hear the drumbeat of her pulse just behind his own.

Mara did it again, harder, the air leaving him in a grunt, but it changed to a surprised cry once her hand dashed out and curled into his hair wrenching his head to the side and there was just her mouth at the side of his neck, as cruel as it was exquisite, giving more bite than kiss, all bruise. Everything burned from it, from the air in his lungs to the nerve endings under his skin, changing his cry into a cracked groan, making his hips push up against her.

Mara laughed huskily, her hand falling to the inside of his thigh, blunt fingernails scratching lightly. His hips hitched, and that was all he’d allow himself, Luke decided, and shifted his focus elsewhere. He didn’t need the Force for this. Just discipline.

She noticed. “You do remember my rules.”

He turned his head to the side. He wouldn't forget. Definitely not about her most important rule. 

“Of course, I do.” But he smiled again, raised his free hand to the skin peeking up from the top of her shirt, because there had to be some leeway with the other rule, here. He stopped just before her hand whipped out to catch his wrist. “No touching, right?” He shifted his gaze back up to her face, inflecting the words with as much earnestness as he could, “Unless you want me to…”

Mara's eyes narrowed. “Always so hopeful.” 

“Patient,” he corrected.

“Farmboy waiting for spring.”

Luke chuckled in spite of himself. “That’s not exactly--”

“I don’t care.” She dug a finger into the inside of his wrist, drawing out a wince. “And since you can’t keep your hands to yourself…” 

Mara slid forward almost straddling him but not quite, the press of her body tighter against his than it'd been the first time as she grabbed his wrist. Luke hissed as the fabric of her pants scratched against his cock. She clicked the second set of the cuffs around his free wrist and the other side to the bedpost, just above his other cuffed wrist. His elbows were bent back, arms behind his head, both wrists cuffed to the same bedpost. She fiddled with some mechanism and the cuffs on the post tightened a bit until both were snug around it to the point that they didn't slide down. The only give was the one or two inches of the chain. 

Other things drew his attention more though. Luke couldn't decide whether to stay cheek pressed against her shirt-covered stomach or look up at her as she checked the cuffs. This close, even now, she felt like she was there for the taking, and that was the kind of lie that wrapped around itself until it felt like the truest thing there was.

Luke silently counted his breaths. Five was enough, and he could grin up at her. “Do you? Keep your hands to yourself? After you’ve been with me?”

He thought she’d slap him again, and, disappointed, he supposed it was too obvious a prod to draw her attention.

Instead, Mara had lowered herself back to straddling his legs, her hand dropping down to slide up his thigh, this close to his cock, but stopping just short of touching him. It wasn’t entirely unpredictable. With her other hand she trailed her fingers just under his navel, moved them low, but not low enough. That wasn’t unpredictable either.

“What if I don’t?” Mara said after a moment, voice taking on the texture of shimmersilk, eyes gone pensive. “What if I’m so wet, I can’t stand it…”

He should have expected that. If there was anything Mara was good at, it was _escalation_.

“Like last time...what if...” Her voice lowered to a purr as she curled an arm around his neck, gaze as soft as a caress. All of it should be dissonant -- she had him cuffed up to the bedpost, his cheek hot and stinging, after all. Her hand did touch his cock then, her forefinger stroking lightly, agonizingly across the wetness at the tip. Luke just barely tamped down on a hiss, checking the impulse to squirm.

She whispered, “What if I did it in your cabin while you were on shift…”

His retort was as swift as the spark of arousal that crackled down his spine. “Liar.”

She pulled her hand away, continued in that same smoky voice as if she hadn’t heard him. “You’ll think about it, won’t you?" She slid that hand over her breast and his eyes traced its slide down as if by the force of his stare he could will it to be his. "Me spread on your bunk, thinking about you, touching myself until I come.”

Lie. Had to be. He was sure it was.

Was it?

Her eyes turned inquisitive. “What was I thinking of, Luke?” She brought her hand to his chest, scratched her fingernails against his left nipple and he gasped. “Touching you like this? Maybe…” Her hand trailed down again and stopped just above the base of his cock. It dropped again to his thigh, stroked up and down in a way that made him swallow hard and think he may have miscalculated because she wasn't done, and he wanted to listen to her with distance, but everything about her, from her voice to the images she was conjuring, to the torturous path her hand made up his thigh held him down, pinning him in place. 

“Making you come with my hands?” she breathed as her hand rubbed slowly up his thigh and back down. “With my mouth? Do you remember how wet I was? How wet having your cock in my mouth made me?”

He was perfectly capable of getting his focus back. It should be easy, but Mara was still going as she carded her fingers gently through his hair. He tried not to think of her hands, or the way her stare burned right through him. He focused on the metal around his wrists, as neutral feeling as there was here, now.

“Was I thinking of that when I touched myself?”

He wasn’t going to make this easy for her, he reminded himself. He wasn't. The metal was tight around his wrists, already warm from his skin. 

“Was I thinking of having you inside me?”

Luke blinked, realizing he'd been straining against the cuffs, and willed himself to relax. He thought he could breathe again, and shifted his gaze back to her face. His head was clear enough that he could see the calculation behind the dark of her eyes, and while he was certain she wanted _this_ it seemed altogether different from the fantasy she was spinning, appealing as it was. _This_ was immediate. That was...vague.

Luke tilted his head, and the words came out with all the flat skepticism he felt. “You want me inside you?” 

There was a flicker of something in her face. That was it. The space between what was her and not. What was real and not. He'd found it -- it hadn't even been that difficult. 

He didn’t get to enjoy the discovery for long because she withdrew her hands from his thigh and her right snapped, cracked against the side of his face hard -- it was the hardest one yet, drawing out a high grunt, leaving his ears ringing, head dazed and bent to the side.

His cheek stung for barely a second before it throbbed, and it felt like confirmation too. He was still blinking neon rings from his line of vision when her thumb went back to his lower lip, rubbing gently. She scooted forward, pressed flush against him shoulder to belly, and between that and the throbbing at the side of his face he had trouble evening out his breathing.

“Maybe I’m thinking about your mouth. How good it was for me.” There, her words wrapped around him mercilessly. That felt real...even if he didn’t _know_ , it might be that he only hoped it was, but...“Wanting it so much more than my hands,” she whispered by his ear, making him shudder so hard he was vibrating like a tuned circuit. “Feeling crazy for it.” 

Luke felt her shivery breath as if in a haze, and she moved away briefly her forehead touched his. Mara smiled, small and private, like he didn't think or he _hoped_ feverishly, that no one else saw. That might be all in play too, but something twisted inside him; he just didn’t know, and wanting her, even as much as he did, was just a fraction of it.

“Maybe I’m just hoping I got the time wrong.” She trailed her lips up his neck, and he moaned, closing his eyes. “Maybe I’m just hoping…”

Mara pulled away and his eyes drifted down to her lips. It slipped from him, soft and aching, “...for me?”

Her smile changed, went back to ice and edge, but he didn’t care because he _knew_ that there was so much underneath, just right _there_. She echoed, “For you,” and he had to lean forward-- 

To be yanked back by the cuffs.

Mara laughed again and there was so much delight in it that it could be pretty, if she weren’t laughing at him. Heat rushed up his face like he’d shown his cards too early, but that laugh was pretty regardless, and under everything, she still wanted him. At the end of the day, she was _here_ with _him_ , and he knew without a single doubt that if he played things just so, all of this could go his way. 

“You’re going to have to do better that,” she said, scooting away. “Not much fun otherwise.”

“Is that what you want?” he asked over the frantic beat of his heart.

Mara stared back, unblinking. “That’s what I want.” She smiled again. “We should make this more interesting though.” She dragged her bag back to her from the foot of the bed, and pulled out some black fabric. She pushed the bag down beside the bed.

Luke made a face before he could help himself. Mara let out another laugh. “But how do you feel about blindfolds?” she teased.

“I don’t like them.” It’s true, and it might be greedy, but the least she can do was let him watch. 

“Perfect.” She wrapped it snug around his head. Her hand fell on his thigh and his hips _jumped_. She chuckled low. “You weren’t going to touch yourself, that’s fine, but I'm not either. Well...” Her hand snaked around his cock and he sucked in a breath sharply, hips pushing up against her grip, tight and so good, he heard what she said next almost as if from a distance, "Not like this."

Mara released him and he tried to order his scattered thoughts. There were a couple of ways this could play out, but he didn’t know. He had preferences though, and those made his pulse tick faster than a faulty detonator timer. He stayed quiet, waiting to see where she’d take it, the unexpectedness not unlike being poised right on the edge of an incline.

“So polite.” Luke could hear the smile in her voice. The next made him think she’d mistook his silence for concern. “I’m making you come regardless.”

She said it casually, but the promise sent plenty of heat to the base of his stomach. Curiosity scratched at him; it sounded like she could be feeling generous in spite of it all.

“What about you?” A little frustration was nothing for the chance to see her fray.

“What about me?”

“Can I--”

“No.” 

“Didn’t let me finish.” He made an annoyed noise.

"Keep complaining and the blindfold's not coming off for the duration of this."

Luke frowned. “I want--”

“Go on. You look good blindfolded. I don't mind keeping you like that _at all_.”

Regardless of that pitch of her voice, that was clearly a threat, so asking right now was not going to work. He turned it over in his head. It might better to wait and see. “Okay.” He made a show of getting himself as comfortable as the cuffs allowed.

He was actually pretty good at waiting.

It wasn’t that long, and when she spoke again she sounded annoyed, which was satisfying, all things considered. “Since you’re so _interested_ , maybe if...” She'd stopped on purpose, he could see it from a mile, but still...

“If?”

“You keep from coming for...hm.” Luke gasped, feeling her fingers skitter up his thigh then back down. The annoyance in her voice turned into satisfaction with a hint of that smokiness. "How long is fair?" she mused.

“You just said fair has nothing to do with this,” he put in dryly, because her fingers were still there tracing a viciously slow path up and down his thigh. “And you brought in a blindfold.”

Mara laughed that delighted laugh. “Five minutes?”

Luke scrunched his face at her under the blindfold. “That’s insulting.”

“Don’t trip over your pride there.”

He chuckled. “You want me to try.”

The bed shifted and he felt her weight slide over his stomach, her palm flat on his chest. She closed it, fingernails scratching lightly when she did. He shifted his focus away, relieved he could. Her hand withdrew and he felt her lean forward, a hand now at his cheek, skin still tingling slightly, sensitive from before. Her breath was at his ear. “No. I want you to struggle.” 

She was back soon enough and announced casually, “I set the chrono for ten.”

Luke laughed. She really liked her time games, and this one was going to be a breeze, but she shifted somewhere across his legs and latched her mouth to the inside of his thigh and the laughter _died_ in his throat. He was suddenly yanking hard against the cuffs, groping for focus, increasingly difficult when she bit down and sucked hard enough that he knew she was leaving a mark. He shut his eyes tight behind the blindfold. Just a little frustration, nothing he couldn't handle. 

Mara's hands were now at his midriff, they swept over his skin for an instant and then Luke felt her shift. Her hair first, the graze of her braid off to the side of his stomach before she moved it, and her lips as she mouthed her way up. It was fine, he felt settled enough that it could feel nice without being agonizing.

His arousal exerted some pressure in his awareness, but it wasn't all encompassing. Push came to shove he could keep this mental state. Mara lightly bit down on his nipple and he teetered for a split second, the cuffs clinking as he pulled with a fast indrawn breath, but it was minor, by the time she was at his neck the feeling was back to pleasant. 

Mara withdrew and there was a rustle of movement. He felt her reach towards his arms cuffed behind him. In doing so, his cheek brushed just below her shoulder and his mind promptly collided with the fact that there was only skin there, not the fabric of her shirt, nor any undergarment. Her fingers traced down from the inside of his wrists to his elbow, but he was more distracted by the impression he was getting that the movement had his cheek graze against the side of her bare breast. He drew in a breath, _hating_ the blindfold. He expected her to move away, keep the tease slight, but she didn't. He knew it was calculation, and he was losing sight of the big picture, but turned his head to brush his lips against her skin. She skittered away before he could consider doing anything more.

There was more rustle of clothing and Luke felt the sweep of her leg against his as she shifted, straddling his thigh and his mind went staticky for a second. It wasn't he pressure of her bare leg, which was fine, he’d expected that, but she was so wet. There was nothing but arousal as he gulped air, the motion straining against the cuffs, feeling her palm splay over his side and glide up over his ribs. 

Luke shifted his leg against her and she let out a sound between a sigh and a moan. He did it again, feeling her push down against it, bringing up his arousal to searing, but he could hold off. He would just want her a little closer, close enough that he could feel her tremble just before she came, and had to shut the thought down immediately before it became unmanageable. 

Mara had moved away, but the next sensation was her tongue licking off the wetness she'd left at his thigh, the hot swipe of it making him moan. Her hand went just under his chin and she was kissing him, sloppy so he could taste her, as if she could lick off all the moans off his tongue. She pulled away, leaving him breathing heavily, feeling about to combust. Her teeth scratched at his shoulder just before she shifted and he felt her forefinger and middle finger at his lips. He sucked them, scraping his teeth gently against the pads, she pulled them out with a slick pop that had him taking in sharp breath after another, trying to ward off the increasing desperation, and fine, he wasn't about to come from this like some kid tripping over his own impatience, but that didn't make it less trying.

Mara slid off him completely. He felt her move away, then her hands pushed against his knee so he could bend it, then the other. Luke thought she might be sitting right between his legs, and the image of her licking up the head of his cock surfaced, leaving him gasping. That rush of air changed to a low grunt as she cupped his sac, his whole body jerking like the shock it was. He meant to say, “cheating,” some variation of “you can’t” --she'd said she wouldn't-- but the words came out hopelessly jumbled. She did it again, and he lost the point of everything, hips jolting up, giving a hard yank at the cuffs, this close to begging for his release, before the reminder surfaced -- they were playing a different game. Different terms. Different. Terms.

When he finally settled himself, her palm was sliding along the inside of his thigh, and he was using the remains of his torn concentration to control his breathing. Different terms. He needed to remember that. 

Mara slid her fingers down further, wet from his mouth, skittering along the crease of his ass. He shifted away instinctively with a surprised grunt, and sense filtered in bit by bit.

“Cheating,” Luke rasped, trying to orient himself. "Said...you...wouldn't." She'd said she wouldn't touch him.

But there she was, trailing down her fingers slowly back up, one wet fingertip tracing a soft torturous line from the underside of his cock, back up to the head. A completely undignified whimper slipped from him and mingled with the clink of the cuffs as he pulled.

“Not." Mara lengthened the pauses as her fingertip made its way back down. "Like. That."

He was supposed to not be doing something or not doing something, but the more she touched him, the more he wanted her to touch him, the more he lost what the point was. He was just squirming, jerking against the cuffs. Not enough. Not even close.

She made a disapproving sound. "Next time, I'm tying up your legs too. You move too much."

Her fingers went back down again, cupped his sac, and he hissed, hips twitching.

"Cheating," Luke breathed out, painfully.

"I told you," Mara said with a laugh. "Just not like that." He had no idea what she meant, not now. All he knew was that he was on the verge of asking her to cheat some more. He shouldn't, there was something he was holding off for, but it was hard to think over the way her fingers glided behind his cock. Her touch there was strange and unexpected, not unpleasant, drawing out a moan, more straining against the cuffs.

He felt her shift and her lips were soft against the side of his knee, she licked up the inside of his left thigh, and he couldn't help but take in air like it was about to run out at any minute. Her mouth was gone, but her fingers continued just sliding along achingly slow. She was just touching him, but his skin _sparked_ under her fingertips, leaving him pulsing with arousal. More moans tumbled from his lips as he squirmed, straining towards that barely-there touch. He yanked at the cuffs, registering a vague stinging now at his wrists, and he welcomed it just to to have some other sensation distract from the maddening, pointless rush and even without that, he wasn't going to come -- he _wanted to_ , but he _couldn't_ \--

“Stop that,” she scolded.

A whine broke from him. He couldn’t -- the gathering of tension was too great, and he was beyond reason, so he kept pulling at the cuffs, barely realizing the build of it. Not enough.

“Beg me to come then.”

He shook his head, not the terms, and her palm struck hard against his inner thigh. He cried out, arching off the bed, sensation sharp and ecstatic right before it graded off to pain and he was left breathing shallowly, drifting in some sort of sensory delirium, that stopped just short of bliss. The seconds lengthened.

"Go on. I'll give it to you if you ask." Mara gently ran her fingertips where she’d struck. But these weren't the terms, he thought gasping at the light touch, digging his heels into the mattress. He meant to just breathe, but another whimper tumbled from him. 

"Go on." There was a cajoling note that seemed to wash over his skin. "Haven't you waited long enough?"

He shook his head again, not trusting his voice. Not the terms...he wanted something else. He wanted _more_ , and then there was her mouth at his thigh, the scratch of her teeth, ripping out a groan from him -- choked -- when her shoulder or arm brushed against his cock. 

Luke pulled on the cuffs hard, the search for friction stretching his body taut, near mindless as she drew away.

Mara spoke again, "You beg so well. Come on. Let me hear it."

He wasn't, not right now, and while he could flail and writhe at her hands, that much, at least, he had with aching certainty. He shook his head again.

She withdrew, and this time her open palm slapped across his face. While he cried out, surprised, it was that with a flash of neon, his whole body jerked up at the impact, his cock brushing along her skin as it did-- she must have been crouching over him again -- and in a mess of overstimulation all he had was a garbled, _no_ as his release snapped hard like a blade lock, leaving him stunned and panting, not quite sure what happened. 

Mara pulled off the blindfold and he blinked at the light, still hazy and out of breath, but then his gaze fixed on his come dripping down her breasts, and while he was spent now he knew the image might as well be seared into his brain. He hadn't finished processing it before Mara went from leaning over him to up on her knees. 

His eyes couldn't unpeel themselves from her breasts, the soft curve of them, her nipples taut, that expanse of pale skin now sticky with his come. It was... unprocessable, he thought, just his, and his cock gave a faint twitch.

Her hand darted out and curled in his hair, and he yelped as she yanked his head up to face her.

For a split second, he wondered if there'd be disgust on her face, but no, all he saw was a kind of...haughtiness that had _always_ looked good on her, and it looked _really_ good on her now. Shockingly good. He held his breath and waited.

Mara lifted her chin. “Clean me up.” 

She let go just as roughly, and he all but dove for her.

It was all he'd been waiting for, not just because the mix of sex and sweat --of _him_ \-- on her was intoxicating, but because of the near frenzied response it garnered. The first lick between her breasts drew a long gasp, his mouth just above her nipple drew another, the languorous stroke from the underside of her breast to nipple earned him a heaving breath and her hands tangling in his hair. He lingered there, tongue stroking across a taut peak, covering it with his mouth and sucking. There, a deep moan escaped her, overwrought and near desperate as she arched back like a woman possessed, all of her pretexts cast aside, just more confirmation that she was better than any fantasy, than even a memory.

Luke had to draw himself away just to look at her for a second -- eyes squeezed shut, that deep flush on her face, the entrancing arch of her bared neck. Even without the Force, he could feel the arousal pouring off her, the primal energy of it. For _him._ Right then and there he didn’t want to cross her rigid lines so much as smear them; a rapturous mess on both of them like warpaint. He dropped his head back on her breast, pulling at the cuffs to lap at more of her, wanting her this unfettered, and more. All of that felt within reach.

“Let me make you come,” he moaned out against her skin.

Mara drew closer and he thought he finally happened on the right thing to say just before her hand darted out again, fingers at the inside of his arm just by his elbow. Pain shot up when she dug them in, hissing, “Are you done?” 

Whatever firmness she might be going for was undercut by her erratic breathing, and it _hurt_ where she was jamming her thumb into the pressure point, but then he just allocated a fraction of concentration more to breathe through it, and shifted his awareness of it to the back of his mind. He didn't even need pull away from where he was mouthing just at the swell of her breast. He didn't even register when she eased off. 

At some point in the next seconds it did dawn on Luke that she hadn’t actually said no. He dragged his mouth to her other breast, and while she didn't moan again, much as he hoped she would, her breaths were fast and harsh, and her hands were back in his hair. 

Mara shifted, drawing his mouth away from her breasts, but it was only to lean back so he could lick down a bit further. He bent down awkwardly, pulling against the cuffs to try to lick down the smooth skin of her stomach. She was _trembling_. She must be so wet, and his own arousal stirred faintly behind it, for all that he'd just come. 

She moved away too soon, meeting his stare, dark eyed and breathless, but there was plenty of capriciousness lurking. 

“I…” Luke paused, thinking had to be all in the asking. He wanted to get this right. 

“You what?”

There was a way to ask, he was sure of it, even if he didn’t know what it was. All that occurred to him was, “I want my mouth on you. More.”

Luke nearly winced at how stupid it sounded. It wasn't like this was anything he was used to asking for, in all of his previous encounters it either happened or didn't, but she smiled, and maybe...that was it? She leaned forward and slid her thumb on the lock of one of the cuffs. He looked at her suspiciously. It was never this easy. 

He wanted her like she was back at Coruscant, hot and writhing on his tongue, but she took his hand and brought it between her legs. He’d be disappointed, but there was damp all the way down her inner thigh and he swallowed, desire sliding down his cock as even that cursory touch drew another heavy breath from her. He had the urge to move his hand up, ease his fingers in her, and throw her into disarray, but a slight twitch of of them was all he allowed the impulse. She pulled his hand up past her wet curls to where she was slick, then withdrew his hand leaving it on her inner thigh.

She leaned over him propping herself up with her other hand against the bedpost, her face only inches away, the black of her pupils vying against the feel of her skin for attention. He licked his lips, captivated by the intensity of her gaze, the hard pull of her wanting. 

Luke brought his fingers to his lips, saw hers part as she breathed. She tasted as good as he remembered, musky and sweet with abandon.

He leaned forward slowly, half afraid to startle her away until his cheek was just a few inches from hers, so close he could feel its warmth just inches away.

“Weren’t you going to take what you want?”

Mara shivered. “Your words.” It was more panted than spoken. “Not mine.”

Luke thought for a moment. There was something else, but he _couldn't get to it_ and there was constriction at his chest at the impossibility. He wanted to nuzzle by her ear, but he didn't _dare_. Not now. He wanted this too much. “Let me give you what you want.”

“I have -- ” More a broken gasp than a whisper. “Everything. I do.”

He knew they’d gone beyond word games -- beyond games, period. He’d suspected from the beginning that desire was just one element of many that showed when they were together like this and broaching any one of those felt far more dangerous than any physical act. At least he wasn’t going out of his mind wanting her -- there was the slightest possibility he could think his way to her.

“You do,” Luke echoed after a moment. What came to him sounded deceptively simple. “So do what you want.” And it was clumsy, but he wanted it clear, so he added. “With me.”

Mara shivered again, and he leaned slightly to rub her cheek with his. She froze, the sudden movement making his throat tighten. Had he said the wrong thing? Done the wrong thing? But Mara was pulling away slightly to brush his lips with hers. There it felt like the first time she’d kissed him and again in the docking bay. Like a concession.

Luke lifted his hand gently to her cheek, deepening the kiss and she responded tentatively at first, but then less cautious, until he could taste just a fraction of all that longing she kept whisked away, half hidden enough that he only glimpsed the fine edges of it. Even that took his breath away. 

He could answer to all of it. Every last bit.

Mara shifted closer with a sigh, and he combed his fingers through her hair, kissed the side of her mouth and her cheek before returning to her lips. It was better than the docking bay -- not necessarily because of the delicious press of her naked body, but because he wasn't sure, but he thought, he _hoped_ that he was tasting a promise in her lips of more than this, more than now, of -- 

The chrono went off.

Mara drew away, leaving him with the fantasy of walking over to the chrono himself, opening the window, and flinging the blasted thing through it.

_He_ might not be overly fond of time games.

She was back soon enough, and he thought she’d lean over and hit the thumb release on the cuffs, but let out a strident gasp once her hand closed around his cock.

She smiled and stroked down.

Luke gaped. 

She then seized his hand in hers passing it from breast down to her stomach to between her legs, pressing it against her and she was so wet, he couldn’t help it. “Let me --”

“Stop talking.”

He knew that tone meant they were back in the game. “Just--”

Her palm whipped out and cracked against his cheek. Not a hard strike, but he was paying attention, certainly. 

"Are we done here?" she asked sharply. 

Luke shook his head quickly. His hand was between her legs; this could go all sorts of ways still. He was definitely regrouping.

But she pushed his hand away, brought it to his cock and he knew what she was going to say before she did. “Make yourself come.”

Luke pouted at her. “But you cheated.”

He expected her to bring up that flimsy technicality, but Mara only smiled one of her meaner smiles. “So?”

“A compromise.” The longer he knew her, the more that smile seemed like an invitation. “This hand there.” He raised his free hand and gestured to her legs.

Mara didn’t quite roll her eyes, but close. “Subtle.”

She leaned over him to undo the cuffs, gasped when he placed an open mouthed kiss at the side of her breast, just like he'd been waiting for since she'd put on that mean smile. He could cheat too, he thought, pulling away before she did.

And just in case, Luke smirked at her and added, “Missed a spot.” In response, she ducked her head to the sore spot she’d left on his neck and scored her teeth on it just as her hand wrapped around his on his cock. He hissed out a curse, hips bucking up, but her hand was gone and she hit the thumb release on the cuffs.

The cuff clicked away and he gyrated his wrist then stretched his arm feeling his knotted muscles protest. Mara stared down his arm with such intensity that he wondered over a way to ask for her hands on him, right before her face became drawn. He followed the line of her gaze to the raised welts at the top of his wrists, a faint line of blood visible. He quickly moved his hand to his side and out of her line of vision. 

“I--”

“Didn’t notice.” He didn’t. He did now, but he didn’t like that look on her face at all. Especially not in this context. “We were in the middle of something?”

“Luke--”

“Later.” Luke slid his hand up her thigh, keeping the underside of his wrist up, fingers skidding along her inner thigh.

“You’re forgetting something,” she breathed.

With a sigh, he palmed his cock again angling the worst of the marks on his wrist as away from her gaze as he could. The way this situation worked out, his left hand was between her legs. Besides the fact that it wasn’t his favored hand, she’d placed herself off to the side and far enough away that he couldn’t do much. Unfair. It was probably written on his face because she chuckled softly.

“Go on.”

With a sigh he turned his attention back, trying to draw himself into it. He was not quite there, and it was even more difficult with her gaze on him. Objectively it was silly for him to be self conscious at this point, but there was no changing that. Just wired that way.

Luke grazed his fingertips along her inner thigh and her breath hitched. That felt different, just different enough that this wasn't as uninteresting as he'd first thought. He raised his eyes to her face, lingered on her lips. He wanted to kiss her again, but she interrupted before he could figure out how to ask.

“You’re not going to get anywhere going that slow.”

It was too difficult to figure out how to ask right now, so he let it go. It wasn’t all lost. He moved his hand from between her legs to her hip. She’d made it so he couldn't do much for her, but that didn’t mean he was going to let the opportunity to touch her pass him by, and maybe, just maybe she’d change her mind…

He drifted his fingers up and across her stomach in light touch, continued along the path his mouth took, remembering the taste of her skin as his fingers traced the side of her breast. Her breaths were shallow, and he brought his fingers back down to her thigh, drifting them up her slippery skin; his hand on his cock had sped up without him realizing it.

For how obviously aroused she was, breathless and dark eyed, her gaze had a feline languor to it, like she had him right where she wanted him. “What are you thinking about?”

He let out a laugh that was no more than a huff of air. “You.” He drew in a breath, not feeling terribly coherent. Or coherent at all. “So wet. You…” He swallowed, the wind of pressure tightening under the certainty of her gaze. It was worlds different like this, knowing at a visceral level how this affected her. “You want me.” It wasn't that precisely. It’s _how_ she wanted him like she was skating on the razor's edge of it, keeping herself perfectly balanced, and he _wondered_ what it would be like if she didn’t, if she stumbled. If she fell. She had once. 

It could be so much better.

Mara leaned forward slightly, she touched his hand as he stroked himself and he took a shaky breath, frustration and anticipation both thick in him.

She murmured, “Stop.”

Luke let out a groan as he did. She pushed his hand away and settled on his lap, his cock pressed against her slick inner thigh, the fleshy part just before the dip of her pelvic bone, and his hips shoved up instinctively, his cock dragging up her skin, damp from her sweat and arousal.

“Fuck.” He wanted to grab her by the hips and thrust up into her, wanted to see her moaning and _lost_ to everyone but him. She smiled, as if she knew, shifted slightly and his cock pressed against her again, wrenching out another ragged breath from him.

“I changed my mind,” Mara said. “I want you to come like this.”

He stared at her dumbly. “What?”

She shifted, pressing her thigh against him, drawing out another answering push of his hips. He moaned, wanting to chase the feeling. In his lust-addled haze the only thing that made sense was the slide of his cock against her slickened skin. He brought his hands to her hips, but just as soon as he did he thought it might be important he not, and yanked them away, looking at her worriedly. 

Mara only laughed that siren's laugh. “Good. Polite.”

She grasped his wrists, her hold sparked pain where the cuffs broke the skin, but here, now, his cock at the slick resistance of her flesh, it was more. It was better, and she guided one hand back to her hip, the other just below the curve of her ass. He couldn't help squeezing and she gasped in a way that drove him to press up harder against her with a groan, quickening his movements. Her hands went to his shoulders, her face slightly tilted as if she wanted to look _into_ him.

He wouldn’t have expected it to feel like this, not this raw, when it was just one hand against the rounded curve of her ass, the other at the flare of her hip as he pulled her to him, the press of his cock against her thigh, but it was all to the heat of her stare. He lowered his forehead to her shoulder, only to cry out in surprise when she yanked his head back by the hair.

“No," she hissed. "I want to see you.”

Luke half groaned her name, _so close_ , she could have _anything_ \-- and the breath itself stalled in his lungs as his hips stuttered sloppily, his release breaking, fracturing his groans, leaving him shuddering, Mara's hand still wound in his hair holding him down under her stare. 

She let go and he sagged against her, panting, his cheek against her collarbone as his heartbeat steadied. Her arm curled around his neck, joined by her other, and he slid his palms up her back, bringing his arms around her, lingering for longer than necessary, long after his breathing evened out. 

“Okay?” she whispered. Luke nodded, trying not to show too much reluctance as he made himself let her go.

Mara moved away slowly, but her hand darted out just under his chin. With an odd, clinical look, she gently tilted his head to the side. Luke shifted away slightly, and she made a vague noise of protest, repeating the motion for a look to the other side. It was still strange, and he shifted away again. 

She reached for his hands next, a concerned look coming over her face. “Your wrists.”

Luke shook his head. “They’re fine,” he whispered, leaning towards her, but pulling his hands away from her reach.

She stayed as if meaning to lean for them again, but he shook his head firmly at her. With a reluctant look, she scooted off to the edge of the bed while he moved forward to lay back on the mattress with a deep sigh, lethargy seeping steadily into him. He did stare as she reached for a washcloth he hadn’t registered she’d put on the bedside table. He made a bit of a mess and it was dripping down her thigh in an obscenely proprietary way regardless of the pattern they’d fallen into. Over the exhaustion, he thought he’d keep that image too.

Luke still frowned at how the evening ended up. It was unsettling that she want to stay dissatisfied -- that had never been the case with anyone he'd been with before. His eyes landed on the red mark at his thigh. Mara wasn't like anyone else though, and what they had -- this, and everything else -- was like nothing he'd ever had either. He’d made it clear she could take her pleasure however she wanted...Mara seemed to be _choosing_ something else though, something more abstract, some control thing whose dimensions he'd yet to figure out. Whatever it was, she’d placed it beyond his reach. That, she'd made clear. 

He turned his thoughts to the fact that she was including him at all. That meant something. Had to. 

For now, Luke stared at her. Her skin glistened in the light, from the graceful slope of her shoulders to the curve of her breasts, the dip of her waist. Though still in its braid, her hair was now mussed, matted down with sweat. She was looking down as she cleaned herself and her face in profile was unguarded and beautiful enough to hurt. It struck him with crushing force that he couldn't bear anyone else seeing her like this. Of her letting anyone else seeing her like this, just as he was.

He had to let this go.

It wasn't forever, he consoled himself. It couldn't be. She was with him still. All the best parts of her. It was just this. 

Mara turned to him again, catching his eyes on her. “You alright?”

Luke pulled himself up on his arm. “Yeah." He gave her a faint smile. "That was...messy.”

Her eyebrows raised. “Complaints?”

“None.” He wanted to say more, that it was incredible, that it always was with her, but all of that sounded stupid even in his head. It sounded like the kind of thing that, at best, would draw an eyeroll, and at worse, make her think he was dumb enough to confuse what they've done behind closed doors with who they were, so the only thing he ended up doing was smiling at her. 

Luke didn't expect her to smile back and reach forward to cup his cheek, but she did. He itched to pull her back into his arms and forget about the pained squeeze in his chest, so it was just as well that it was for just a second, and she slid off the bed, padding over to the ‘fresher. 

A few minutes later Luke heard the shower turn on. He lay back feeling bruised and utterly worn out, trying to summon the will to move, finally gathering enough to clean himself and toss the washcloth over the side of the bed. He’d shower after her and they’d head back to the apartments. That would be that.

That hollow feeling gathered in him and it only grew worse the longer he stayed on the bed, so he stood and got his clothes while Mara finished. She emerged shortly after, towel wrapped around her, and the feeling transformed into such a dull, painful throb at the center of his chest that he couldn’t look at her as he walked into the ‘fresher. He went through the shower perfunctorily, thinking she’d have her bag packed and be sitting on the bed on her datapad. It’d be fine. He'd work through it.

And she _was_ on her datapad, but she was lying down, and there were miles and miles of exposed leg since she was wearing a loose sleep tunic shirt that just barely reached past her hips.

He was just … absolutely terrified to hope. “How long do we have the room for?”

“Early tomorrow." She gestured to his face. "The red has gone down, but I don’t want to take you back to the apartments until it's gone.” 

That...sounded excessively paranoid. He checked after showering, and it didn't look like anything worse than a violent blush or something he could chalk up to exercise. 

Mara put the datapad down on the beside table. “Come here.” She sat up and grabbed a small bag from the table, lifting a few packets of bacta salve from it. “Let me look at your wrists.”

And that was another thing entirely. Luke shook his head adamantly. “They’re fine. I mean it.” They were actually not that fine, they were bruised and stinging from where the metal broke skin, but it was nothing that required that much ceremony, mostly because there was something entirely wrong in her demeanor about them. All his tunics were long-sleeved anyway.

Frowning, Mara went back to lie on her side, and Luke decided he'd take the scene before him as an invitation. He got rid of everything but his underwear, climbing up on the bed beside her close enough to touch, but at the last minute left a sliver of space between them for fear of wanting too much. It was all so uncertain... he wished he could stretch out and get a sense of her feelings, but it wasn't safe. Not now.

“Maybe stun cuffs weren’t a good idea,” she mumbled, and he wanted to laugh that _this_ of all things be weighing on her. He didn't do a good enough job of suppressing it, and Mara looked over her shoulder.

“They were a _great_ idea.” He flopped over to his side. “The wrists are fine. Really. I’ll take care of them later if they bother you that much.”

She sighed sharply. There was something discomfiting about it and he threw caution to the wind, wrapping himself around her. It stung a bit where his wrists grazed the sheets as he pulled her to him, but not enough to even draw out a wince. Part of him cautioned against holding her like this when there was so much hurt looming, but it wasn't like hurt had ever been a deterrent for him. 

“It’s nothing. Scratches. I mean it.” Maybe he could just switch the subject. "You should have told me we'd have the room the whole night. I didn't bring a change of clothes." 

Mara was looking down at his wrists as his arms encircled her waist. Maybe he should feel bad that it was her unease that allowed him this close, but everything about her in his arms was just as the universe should be. He wasn't above it. He'd take as much as he could have. 

"Slipped my mind," she said in a tight voice. "Sorry."

"It's fine." Luke pressed his cheek against her shoulder, her damp hair cool against it, and closed his eyes. It'd be okay. Everything else between them was more important than this. This was just fun.

He opened them when he felt her reach with the Force, the kind of pulling and weaving that signaled a healing technique.

“You don’t have to do that,” he whispered, dismayed.

“I don’t like them,” she whispered back.

That was confusing, but he let her. Having her stew on them was worse.

His thoughts were pulled back to the subject he dreaded to broach. He didn’t have to -- he could pretend. Here, it didn’t seem like there could ever be any more than the two of them. But they'd be going back to reality soon and that once there, he’d be regretting letting everything slide. It would eat at him. He couldn't delude himself into thinking it wouldn't put everything they'd built at risk.

“What is it?” Mara asked after she was done. She pulled away and shifted to face him. “Something’s bothering you. You’ve been on edge all night. Even before -- since Siskeen. Yanibar still?”

Yanibar and her promise was why he has to broach this. He couldn't let _this_ come between _that_. Yanibar was real. Her promise was real. It was everything.

He steeled himself and blurted out, “I keep thinking about Sia--” And realized he’d inadvertently put his foot squarely in his mouth when her expression became instantly more guarded. “No no no,” he backtracked gracelessly, “Not like that. I don’t like her. I like you,” and he winced at how childish it sounded, but he continued out of the hope that what he was saying would sort itself out somewhere along the way. “I like this with you. I don’t want anyone else.” This was similar ground from just a few days ago, so he could finish with, “I told you.”

Mara nodded. "I know." This time it didn't sound dismissive, it sounded like she was waiting for him to go on. That was heartening.

He stayed quiet for a bit more, wanting to figure out how to put everything to words. The right ones. “I just meant...I wondered,” he revised. “How you felt.”

Comprehension dawned on her face, and with it, incredulity in the form of that look that questioned his mental sanity. He’d had the opportunity to become reacquainted with it at Yanibar. “You mean if I was sleeping with anyone else?”

Luke shook his head, certain she wasn’t. That was never the issue. “That you’d want to.”

“I don’t.”

He should have felt satisfied with it, but he didn’t. “Why?” She stayed silent and he ventured, “If we’re doing this because it’s fun. That’s fine, it is, but it--” His breath caught in his throat and he knew that he had to broach it. It was too much to risk otherwise. “That’s not why I’m doing it.” He paused, expecting her to ask, but she didn’t, and that hurt. She might not even _care_. He kept going. “I’m doing it because -- “

“The trust thing,” Mara interrupted suddenly, and on the one hand, he was grateful she finally joined in, and on the other, that wasn't it exactly. 

“Kind of.” Luke felt her stiffen and that hurt too. He forced himself to keep going. “Because it’s between us. Just us. I like that. But it wouldn’t feel like that if you were with anyone else. It wouldn’t feel the same.”

The next part was even harder to get out of his throat. “And that’s just me. I don’t -- I don’t expect anything. From you. But I just want to know, because if you want...other people...It’s fine, but I don’t think...” His nerve failed him and he shook his head.

“So we can stop you mean?”

Luke nodded. “It doesn't feel right to do this if we’re not on the same page about that.” He took a breath. “I don’t want it to affect anything else.”

“Training.”

He felt a surge of annoyance. “Not just training. It’s more. You know me...maybe the best after Han and Leia. I like to think it’s the same for you. That I know you, and that between us... it’s good, right?” He hardly dared to breathe, but then she nodded, and he could smile at her, relief staggering him. “This is...it’s great, but that matters to me...more.”

“And you don’t think you could just...compartmentalize.” She made a gesture. “ If I were to sleep with anyone else?”

Just her mentioning it spread the pang further and now there was a bitter taste in his mouth. It was hard to put to words how awful it felt just the thought of her letting someone else this close, even if they meant nothing to her -- that it might be the same for her with anyone else. He could only manage, “I’m still human, Mara.”

She let out a sharp laugh. “Good to know.” And something about her response seemed flip, but not dangerously so...

His chest felt tight again as he stared at her. “Just let me know,” he said softly. “It’s fine if we stop.” He’d make that true if he had to. He would. She promised. He'd deal with whatever he had to for that. 

It took her a while to respond. “What makes you think I want to do this with anyone else?” 

Luke shrugged. “Maybe not exactly like this. I don’t…” He felt heat making its way up his face. He felt out of his depth in the whole _form_ of what they've done whenever he really thought about it with any distance, like it was something more at home in some dirty holo than in his life, especially at this point in time. That wasn’t how it _felt_ though. At all. “I’m not...sure what you’re getting out of this--”

“Don’t ask me to explain. I won’t.” Her tone went durasteel like it did whenever she felt she was being questioned and would allow it no quarter. “This is what I want.”

Despite her reticence, her ferocity in the last made him feel warm. That was what might go for assurance in Mara-speak.

To his surprise, she was still talking. “I don’t want cheap fucks and I don’t want anything complicated in my life.” She shifted back to her side and away from him. “This is good between us. Just don’t ask me to explain.”

He couldn’t help but pull her back. Mara was as stiff as a plasteel panel in his arms, but she didn’t pull away. That too felt like a concession. 

Nothing between them had ever been cheap, even if it was the very _definition_ of complicated, but he didn’t mind that -- not when what they had gave him so much back in return and promised even more. As long as this remained just between them, he could make concessions of his own.

“I won’t,” Luke said after a moment. “It’s a trust thing.” Her shoulders were still rigid, so he aimed for a blatant tease. "You weren't...ruffled about Sia...at all?"

She made a dismissive noise. "Of course not."

"Not even a little bit?"

"Please."

"Oh?" Luke was almost positive that was a lie. Now, he could snicker and needle a bit more, "Turbolifts and flimsi-cards."

Mara huffed, "I don't know what you're talking about," in the exact tone of voice she used when she wondered why anyone would drink hot chocolate, one might as well lick glaze. The same tone she used when she said she'd made herself some _only_ because there was nothing else on hand in the kitchens, despite blatant proof otherwise.

That was also an excessively arch tone when she continued, "So aggressive. Indecent."

Luke laughed heartily, his cheek against her damp hair, curling himself tighter around her. "Which reminds me," he murmured. "Did you really go into my cabin and…?”

She chuckled, a rich, heady sound if there was one. 

“You know with the Force--”

She let out an indignant squawk, pulling away to fix him with a glare over her shoulder. “What kind of Jedi uses the Force for _that_?”

“A curious one.”

“See, that’s why I can never play fair,” she grumbled.

Luke drew himself back closer to her, humming contentedly against her nape. “And here I thought it’s because you’re so good at cheating.” She made a chastising sound in response. 

His unease from the past days ebbed away. Everything was right when he was holding her. Strange, she’d let him just once before, that first time back in Coruscant and yet...

“I’ve missed this,” he murmured half to himself.

“I know.” Her hushed reply took him aback, more so when she continued, “I’ve wanted to, just with work...sometimes my focus isn’t...there.”

He was puzzled at first before he realized she’d misunderstood him. He held his tongue because while she didn’t feel as tense as before, neither was she completely relaxed. Come to think of it, he wasn’t sure he’d ever seen her completely relaxed. That along with her response rippled through his contentment a bit.

“It’s okay.” 

He couldn’t help but wonder again what it would be like if she weren’t so focused. But for now this was enough. All of what they were to each other was already beginning to line up. It hadn't even taken that long. 

Luke breathed in the smell of the hotel shampoo in her hair, feeling himself drift off. 

He couldn’t imagine being anywhere but here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So ends the second arc of this series. More to come later on. Thank you for reading <3


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